Writing your own obituary might feel like an unusual task, but it can be a meaningful and even empowering exercise. By taking control of how your life story is told, you have the chance to reflect on your experiences, celebrate your accomplishments, and leave a lasting impression that resonates with those you leave behind. Moreover, by adding a touch of humor, you can inject warmth and levity into a typically somber piece of writing. In this article, we’ll guide you through the process of how to write an obituary for yourself that captures your essence, conveys your wishes, and even brings a smile to the faces of your loved ones.
Why Write Your Own Obituary?
Writing your own obituary ensures that your story is told the way you want it to be. You’re the expert on your life, so who better to craft the narrative? Here are a few reasons why you might choose to write your own obituary:
- Clarity and Accuracy: You can ensure that all the details, from your name to your accomplishments, are correct.
- Personal Touch: By writing your own obituary, you have the opportunity to infuse it with your unique voice and personality.
- Easing the Burden: Losing a loved one is difficult, and writing an obituary can be an emotional task for family members. Preparing it in advance can relieve some of this stress.
- Legacy and Humor: You can leave behind a legacy that’s true to who you are—even adding humor to lighten the mood and celebrate life.
Getting Started: How to Write an Obituary
The first step in writing your own obituary is to gather the essential information. An obituary typically includes key details about your life, relationships, accomplishments, and personality. Let’s break it down step by step:
1. Start with the Basics
Every obituary begins with essential details about the deceased. For your self-written obituary, include:
- Full name, including any nicknames or maiden names you want mentioned.
- Date and place of birth.
- Date and place of death (leave this blank for now, of course!).
- Names of family members (parents, siblings, spouse, children, grandchildren).
2. Highlight Your Life Story
This is the heart of the obituary. Summarize your life story, touching on significant milestones, such as:
- Education and career highlights.
- Marriages and relationships.
- Major achievements or contributions.
- Hobbies, interests, and passions.
- Travels or adventures that were especially meaningful.
For example: “Jane Doe graduated from Harvard University with a degree in literature, later channeling her love of storytelling into a successful career as an editor. She traveled to over 30 countries, collecting recipes, friendships, and unforgettable memories along the way.”
3. Celebrate Your Personality
Your obituary is an opportunity to showcase the traits that made you unique. Were you known for your kindness, wit, or adventurous spirit? Don’t be afraid to include personal anecdotes or quirks that reveal your true self.
4. Add Humor—Tastefully
While it’s important to be respectful, adding humor can make your obituary memorable. Think about ways to incorporate light-hearted elements, such as:
- A favorite joke or saying.
- A funny story from your life.
- Playful reflections, like: “Jane loved gardening—though her plants often wished she loved them a little less.”
Humor can provide comfort to those reading your obituary and remind them of the joy you brought to their lives.
5. Express Gratitude and Wishes
Conclude your obituary with messages of gratitude and your final wishes. For example:
- Thank the people who made your life meaningful, such as family, friends, or mentors.
- Share your wishes for memorial services, donations, or other arrangements. For instance, “In lieu of flowers, Jane requested donations to her favorite charity, Save the Bees.”
Tips for Writing with Grace and Humor
- Balance Tone and Content: While humor can lighten the mood, avoid jokes that might be misunderstood or inappropriate. The goal is to bring smiles, not discomfort.
- Be Authentic: Write in your natural voice, whether that’s formal, casual, or somewhere in between. Your obituary should sound like you.
- Involve Loved Ones: If you’re comfortable, share drafts with trusted friends or family members for feedback. They might provide valuable insights or ideas.
“Write Your Own Obituary” Exercise
If you’re unsure where to start, consider using prompts to guide your writing. Here are some questions to help you craft a compelling obituary:
- What are the three most important things you’ve accomplished?
- How would you describe your personality in five words?
- What is one funny or touching memory that defines who you are?
- What message would you like to leave for your loved ones?
Examples of Obituaries with Grace and Humor
Here are a few examples of how to write an obituary that blends grace and humor:
- “John Smith, who always believed dessert should come first, passed away peacefully at age 85. A man of few words and many puns, John brought laughter and love to all who knew him.”
- “Mary Jones, known for her infectious laugh and her knack for turning strangers into friends, leaves behind a legacy of kindness, humor, and perfectly burnt toast.”
- “Tom Brown, whose golf game never quite improved but whose storytelling skills were unmatched, bid farewell on July 12th, surrounded by family and his ever-loyal dog, Max.”
Why Humor Matters
Including humor in your obituary can:
- Provide comfort and levity during a difficult time.
- Reflect your personality and how you want to be remembered.
- Help loved ones celebrate your life rather than solely mourn your loss.
Finalizing Your Obituary
Once you’ve completed your obituary, save it in a safe place and share it with someone you trust. You may also want to revisit it periodically to make updates or adjustments as your life evolves.
Conclusion
Learning how to write an obituary for yourself is a powerful exercise in self-reflection, gratitude, and creativity. By approaching the task with grace and humor, you can create a lasting tribute that captures your essence and leaves a smile on the faces of those who read it. Remember, writing your own obituary isn’t about dwelling on the end—it’s about celebrating the journey and the memories you’ll leave behind. So take a deep breath, grab a pen, and start crafting a story that’s uniquely yours.
